A classmate from high school recently passed away from cancer. My heart is heavy with sadness not for him, because he is no longer in pain. My heart is heavy for those who are left here. His wonderful wife and two great children and not to mention all his other family and friends. It just shows us that we never know when our time is done here and to enjoy the time we do have!
We are never guaranteed a certain length of time we are to live, so with that in mind we should be on our best and really speak of love to others. We really need to take the time to let others know how special they are to us and how much we appreciate them. I know this is not always easy to do and really draws some of us out of our comfort zone, but wouldn't you rather have someone know how much you appreciate them rather than you regretting that you didn't get to say it and they passed away?
I am going to challenge myself to let others know I love them and really do appreciate them and what they do! Who else is up to this challenge?
God calls us to be courageous and this is a courageous act. He also calls us to love one another and this will challenge us to show our love!
I am curious to know who else is going to do this. So please let me know and also let me know how it is going for you.
Saturday, November 10, 2012
Saturday, October 6, 2012
Thick skin
I have been trying to live a "Christian lifestyle" for eighteen years and one thing that I have learned and actually am still learning is not to be easily offended. I am truly blessed to have met a godly man who encourages my walk with my Heavenly Father and who often shares the same passion of ministries. In our years of service we have encountered the "nightmares" of ministry. This includes discouraging and negative comments, actions from others opposite of our intentions and even the feeling of those going behind our backs.
I write all this not to be discouraging but to remind there this is nothing new to God. Anything that happens now has happened before. The scripture states in Ecclesiastes 1:9, "and there is nothing new under the sun." What we have gone through in the past has already happened before. This was not a new experience; it was new to us! As I was battling my hurt and bitterness, my husband came across a great sermon by John Piper. This was divine intervention and felt like the sermon was meant just for us.
God has written great examples of other men who have experienced what we have. Look at writings of Paul. Paul experienced much while on Earth and still kept his faith and his sight on furthering the gospel. In fact he was abandoned by his fellow believers in his time of great need. In 2 Timothy starting at verse 9 Paul was at trial in the courts and no one stood by him. How awful that must have been for Paul! At least Tom and I had each other in all the different experiences and could share our burdens. It would have been extremely difficult to handle without a fellow believer by my side. Paul does not get offended by by being deserted. He does the exact opposite; he forgives them! Amazing to read and incomprehensible to us average humans, I would not have had the same reaction. Paul's sight is clearly on Jesus and his writings reflect that. This was a huge wake up call for me. If a man who was going through far more trials in life than I can forgive other believers for abandoning him, then why can I not do the same? Now don't get me wrong this was not a fix in the snap of a finger! It does take time for emotions and thought processes to work themselves out and much prayer. I kept reminding myself of Paul as I worked through the process of forgiveness.
I had to remind myself that what I took as offense may not have been meant for offense. Paul conveys in other writings that other believers did not always agree on the same method, but they did agree on furthering the gospel. It is important to take a step back and look to see if the actions of others is meant to further the gospel. I needed to have a different perspective. Instead of me thinking I was the victim and these people did this to me, I needed to look and see what the intentions of the others was. This would be sure to prove that others were not out to offend they were merely taking action on where they felt called. More prayer and conversing with God was what got us through our time of healing.
Offense will happen again. It is a guarantee while we are here on Earth. It will be my choice in how I react to these offenses that will make all the difference. I need to develop a "thick skin" with the help of my Father and by reading His word.
I write all this not to be discouraging but to remind there this is nothing new to God. Anything that happens now has happened before. The scripture states in Ecclesiastes 1:9, "and there is nothing new under the sun." What we have gone through in the past has already happened before. This was not a new experience; it was new to us! As I was battling my hurt and bitterness, my husband came across a great sermon by John Piper. This was divine intervention and felt like the sermon was meant just for us.
God has written great examples of other men who have experienced what we have. Look at writings of Paul. Paul experienced much while on Earth and still kept his faith and his sight on furthering the gospel. In fact he was abandoned by his fellow believers in his time of great need. In 2 Timothy starting at verse 9 Paul was at trial in the courts and no one stood by him. How awful that must have been for Paul! At least Tom and I had each other in all the different experiences and could share our burdens. It would have been extremely difficult to handle without a fellow believer by my side. Paul does not get offended by by being deserted. He does the exact opposite; he forgives them! Amazing to read and incomprehensible to us average humans, I would not have had the same reaction. Paul's sight is clearly on Jesus and his writings reflect that. This was a huge wake up call for me. If a man who was going through far more trials in life than I can forgive other believers for abandoning him, then why can I not do the same? Now don't get me wrong this was not a fix in the snap of a finger! It does take time for emotions and thought processes to work themselves out and much prayer. I kept reminding myself of Paul as I worked through the process of forgiveness.
I had to remind myself that what I took as offense may not have been meant for offense. Paul conveys in other writings that other believers did not always agree on the same method, but they did agree on furthering the gospel. It is important to take a step back and look to see if the actions of others is meant to further the gospel. I needed to have a different perspective. Instead of me thinking I was the victim and these people did this to me, I needed to look and see what the intentions of the others was. This would be sure to prove that others were not out to offend they were merely taking action on where they felt called. More prayer and conversing with God was what got us through our time of healing.
Offense will happen again. It is a guarantee while we are here on Earth. It will be my choice in how I react to these offenses that will make all the difference. I need to develop a "thick skin" with the help of my Father and by reading His word.
Monday, June 25, 2012
A Humorous teaching moment
I truly love kids! They say the best things at times! My kids are no exception to this truth. Even as they have grown into the double digits, we still have moments of pure enjoyment from their comments. This recently happend about two months ago. I just have to share this moment since it turned into another teaching moment.
Our church has communion once a month, a practice established years back. This particular Sunday our church was quite populated, always a good problem, and we unfortunately did not get to sit all together as a family like we usually do. At this time our middle child was sitting in a pew ahead of us and an aisle away. He ended up moving all the way down to make room for a family we did not know. That was very gentlemanly of him! A proud moment for a parent. Our Pastor started with asking all of us to stand if we have accepted Christ as our personal Savior. Then he went through years of being saved. Seth had taken note that the dad of the family sitting next to him stood up for being saved. So the service continues and the Lord's supper is presented. Our pastor always welcomes fellow believers for communion. The contents of the small cracker are passed and Seth hands it to his neighbor who passes without taking one.
Seth simply turns to the man and innocently asks, "Are you allergic?"
The man replies with a small smile and "No" and gently pats Seth on his back.
Now for us adults this moment just makes me smile and laugh. I truly enjoy my kids! Moments like these I even say that to them! I was even shocked that Seth had enough courage to ask the man that himself.
Seth told me he was confused because the man had stood up in the service if you were saved. We do have many friends who have very sensitive food allergies so he was just trying to make sense of this in his own mind. So this was now my turn to make it a teachable moment.
I explained to Seth that in the New Testament scriptures it says to examine ourselves.
For whenever you eat this bread and drink this cup, you proclaim the Lord's death until he comes. 1 Corinthians 11:26 (NIV)
I further explained that we need to look at our own lives and make sure we are in line with God's best for us. If we find that we are outright sinning then we should pass on communion. I also told him the man could have other reasons for passing the communion plate and it is not our job to judge him.
What a great moment for us to continue our learning of God's Word!
Friday, March 9, 2012
The "and then" instead of the "what if"
Our wondrous vacation date had finally arrived! We had planned to leave around 6 in the morning, everyone was super excited! In fact, the kids were so excited they all went to bed early and we had no arguments about it. Tom and I hit the hay early too because we both knew that we had a long traveling day ahead of us. We decided that we wouldn’t set the alarm and would just get up whenever we awoke. No problems there, since I’ve hit that pre-menopausal state my body wakes me up early (and I mean early) every morning. This time was no exception. I woke up eyes wide open at 3 a.m.! Tom must have been excited because he heard me get up and said, “Do you want to get up and go now?”
I replied with, “Might as well, we have a long way to go.”
Our plans for our vacation included a trip to Orlando with making a stop in Warner Robbins, GA. The first leg of our journey would be about 13 hours in the van. The kids had packed DVDs, books, computer, Nintendo DS and of course snacks. They were all set to make this journey. Tom had done most of the packing of luggage the night before so all that was needed was our few belongings and we were off! We had our traditional word of prayer before we left and we all piled into the van. It was 8 degrees outside! Wow! That was cold! We opted not to take coats since we were heading south and we would be in the van, our coats would just take up more space. Good thing Kyanne and I brought small lap fleece blankets.
Our faith was tested literally within minutes of our trip. Tom had stopped at the ATM to withdraw cash for the road trip south and the machine replied with, “YOU HAVE EXCEEDED YOUR LIMIT”. My heart started to race immediately, it was 4 in the morning and the only way our card could have exceeded the limit was if someone had stolen our information. “GREAT!” my mind screamed, “headed out on vacation, reservations made, van packed, excited family and now it’s going to be ruined!” My husband remained calm and simply claimed, “The machine must be out of money, and we’ll stop at another one on our way.” Wow! I was impressed with his composure. I am sure I looked calm on the outside; however, my mind was running 100 miles per hour. I kept thinking of all the phone calls I would need to make and the worst part it was Sunday. I would have to wait a whole day before things could be resolved. I decided that if my husband could keep his composure then I surely should. I grabbed a hold of my thoughts and reminded myself, “You just had prayer about this being a safe and wonderful vacation, now just keep your FAITH that God will work this out.” So while we drove to the next bank location I said a small prayer. Instead of me freaking out about the “what ifs” I decided to rely on God for the “and then”. We arrived at the next ATM, Tom tried the transaction and the first time it was the same response, “YOU HAVE EXCEEDED YOUR LIMIT”. So he decided to try something different and “voila” our money was dispensed. We both let out a huge “WHEW!” as we looked at each other. He gathered his card and funds and we headed on our way.
What a lesson to our kids (and ourselves) about having faith, remaining calm in the situation and leaning on God to provide. This may seem trivial to some, but to those who believe understand completely what message this story brings. This lesson in our life journey brought certain scripture to my mind. In Proverbs 3:5 it states, “Trust in the Lord with all your heart and lean not on your own understanding;” We definitely learned that we had put our trust in God that early Sunday morning. It is much more peaceful to talk about the “AND THEN” in our lives rather than letting our minds race to all the “WHAT IFS” that might happen.
Wednesday, February 22, 2012
A Case of the Teachers Being Taught
Tom and I had prepared the lesson for Sunday School for our Junior High group. The curriculum is very teacher friendly and lays it all out in a very basic format. We both have learned through teaching that many times the lessons take a shape of their own. You really never know what a Junior High kid might say and where your lesson will go from there. Lately, our lessons have really been hitting home for both Tom and me and this last week was no exception. Just because we are the teachers does not mean we can't learn, right? RIGHT!
Our lesson this last Sunday was titled "Handling the Pain of Divorce" and we started our lesson with scripture reading of Isaiah 43:1-2 1
But now, this is what the LORD says— he who created you, Jacob,
he who formed you, Israel:
“Do not fear, for I have redeemed you;
I have summoned you by name; you are mine.
2 When you pass through the waters,
I will be with you;
and when you pass through the rivers,
they will not sweep over you.
When you walk through the fire,
you will not be burned;
the flames will not set you ablaze.
The lesson went on to discuss how God will never leave us alone, that God will give us strength and mostly that God's love is greater than our pain. Pretty powerful lesson for Junior High kids. We began discussing these and Tom and I could easily see the application of this lesson in our lives. Not that we are handling divorce, but more of our daily real life challenges. We recently had vehicle problems twice in the past week, along with our dryer not wanting to work and also our bathroom shower faucet totally breaking. A week of problems compounded with us trying to get the family ready for our long awaited family vacation. Tom and I were fretting over the cost of the latest issue of our van and when we found out that a job of $200.00 is actually covered under warranty we were ecstatic! Tom took that teachable moment right then and there to say to our children, "See, when I talk about God being there? I'm not just making it up, but He actually does care and surprises us with blessings!" He continued with saying, "these lessons we talk about in Sunday school apply to everyone not just the teens."
Why is that we as Christians say we have faith but act surprised when God blesses us? I am guilty of this all the time! I think part of me thinks that it's because I don't deserve it, which is true. This is God's sovereign grace! I am so thankful that He gives me blessings instead of what I actually deserve because that is God's mercy. We who are believers are His children and what lovely gifts the Father bestows on His children! I need to remind myself of this often and remind my own children as well so that they may see the glory of God living right out in front of them.
Teaching Sunday school to a group of Junior high kids has been quite experience for both Tom and me. We continue to be taught as we teach!
Our lesson this last Sunday was titled "Handling the Pain of Divorce" and we started our lesson with scripture reading of Isaiah 43:1-2 1
But now, this is what the LORD says— he who created you, Jacob,
he who formed you, Israel:
“Do not fear, for I have redeemed you;
I have summoned you by name; you are mine.
2 When you pass through the waters,
I will be with you;
and when you pass through the rivers,
they will not sweep over you.
When you walk through the fire,
you will not be burned;
the flames will not set you ablaze.
The lesson went on to discuss how God will never leave us alone, that God will give us strength and mostly that God's love is greater than our pain. Pretty powerful lesson for Junior High kids. We began discussing these and Tom and I could easily see the application of this lesson in our lives. Not that we are handling divorce, but more of our daily real life challenges. We recently had vehicle problems twice in the past week, along with our dryer not wanting to work and also our bathroom shower faucet totally breaking. A week of problems compounded with us trying to get the family ready for our long awaited family vacation. Tom and I were fretting over the cost of the latest issue of our van and when we found out that a job of $200.00 is actually covered under warranty we were ecstatic! Tom took that teachable moment right then and there to say to our children, "See, when I talk about God being there? I'm not just making it up, but He actually does care and surprises us with blessings!" He continued with saying, "these lessons we talk about in Sunday school apply to everyone not just the teens."
Why is that we as Christians say we have faith but act surprised when God blesses us? I am guilty of this all the time! I think part of me thinks that it's because I don't deserve it, which is true. This is God's sovereign grace! I am so thankful that He gives me blessings instead of what I actually deserve because that is God's mercy. We who are believers are His children and what lovely gifts the Father bestows on His children! I need to remind myself of this often and remind my own children as well so that they may see the glory of God living right out in front of them.
Teaching Sunday school to a group of Junior high kids has been quite experience for both Tom and me. We continue to be taught as we teach!
Saturday, January 28, 2012
Attitude Adjustment
It never ceases to amaze me how reading the Bible can give me an attitude adjustment! I was all set in my mind and heart, I had my topic all picked and was set out to prove others they were in the wrong. I grabbed my well worn Bible and sat down with paper and pen ready to gather my ammunition for battle. I scoured through my concordance, but to not avail. I was not finding the verses I needed. So next step? Tom's Bible! Yes! He has as a huge ESV that contains way more information than one person could ever retain. I know his Bible will have what I need! I was wrong again. I could not any scriptures that fit what I wanted to say. If you are reading this carefully, then you just caught that last part "of what I wanted."
So I go to the newest technology. . . THE INTERNET, our largest resource that can quickly dispense information in less time than a blink of the eye. I simply type in a short phrase and hit search and PRESTO - thousands of sites are at my disposal. I'm elated to find so many sites that will fit what I have been looking for. God has a way of working things out for His glory, because as soon as I look at the first site the Holy Spirit is speaking to me. I am fighting this internally and ask myself, "How can I be wrong?"
"I did the right thing, didn't I?"
I know and feel at peace that I did the right thing; however, my attitude was not of Christ. I had a gentle reminder that our greatest commandments are to "LOVE GOD LOVE OTHERS". I know my attitude was the farthest thing from showing love.
A old wise saying came to mind as I was reading through scripture verses. "If you don't have anything nice to say, then don't say anything at all." This very wise saying can be stemmed from 1 Peter 3:8-11 " Finally, all of you, be like-minded, be sympathetic, love one another, be compassionate and humble. 9 Do not repay evil with evil or insult with insult. On the contrary, repay evil with blessing, because to this you were called so that you may inherit a blessing. 10 For, “Whoever would love life and see good days
must keep their tongue from evil and their lips from deceitful speech. They must turn from evil and do good; they must seek peace and pursue it." (NIV)
Even though my actions were right for my beliefs; my mouth and attitude were very wrong.
It's a great thing to know that God does not keep record of wrong doing (1 Cor. 13) because God is LOVE. I would be in serious trouble if this were not true! I have learned a valuable lesson and I am so grateful that I have such a wonderful, gentle Teacher.
So I go to the newest technology. . . THE INTERNET, our largest resource that can quickly dispense information in less time than a blink of the eye. I simply type in a short phrase and hit search and PRESTO - thousands of sites are at my disposal. I'm elated to find so many sites that will fit what I have been looking for. God has a way of working things out for His glory, because as soon as I look at the first site the Holy Spirit is speaking to me. I am fighting this internally and ask myself, "How can I be wrong?"
"I did the right thing, didn't I?"
I know and feel at peace that I did the right thing; however, my attitude was not of Christ. I had a gentle reminder that our greatest commandments are to "LOVE GOD LOVE OTHERS". I know my attitude was the farthest thing from showing love.
A old wise saying came to mind as I was reading through scripture verses. "If you don't have anything nice to say, then don't say anything at all." This very wise saying can be stemmed from 1 Peter 3:8-11 " Finally, all of you, be like-minded, be sympathetic, love one another, be compassionate and humble. 9 Do not repay evil with evil or insult with insult. On the contrary, repay evil with blessing, because to this you were called so that you may inherit a blessing. 10 For, “Whoever would love life and see good days
must keep their tongue from evil and their lips from deceitful speech. They must turn from evil and do good; they must seek peace and pursue it." (NIV)
Even though my actions were right for my beliefs; my mouth and attitude were very wrong.
It's a great thing to know that God does not keep record of wrong doing (1 Cor. 13) because God is LOVE. I would be in serious trouble if this were not true! I have learned a valuable lesson and I am so grateful that I have such a wonderful, gentle Teacher.
Wednesday, January 18, 2012
Growing Old with Dignity continued
"My life is in your hands," she says weepingly on the phone. Talk about tugging on those heart strings!
"Yes, Grandma. I know. I'll take care of you," is my somber reply.
I have been her "go to girl" for about six years now and increasingly so the past few years. She often comments to others "I don't know what I would do without her." That comments warms my heart and I just feel simple pleasure that I can payback all she has done for me the past forty (almost forty-one) years.
Small things like setting her answering machine, clocks, microwave, nightlight timers were things I would do for her. Now that she is in adult foster care home my repsonsibilities have slightly shifted. Those tasks are no longer mine; however, I do still assist with various doctor, hair, eye, ear appointments and all her paperwork and mail.
She tells me that she is due for a haircut and would like it this week. A little demanding? Sometimes she can be, but that just reminds me where I get that character trait. I remind her that it's only been a month and she wants to argue about that. So I simply tell her that I will call and see what her hairdresser has available. That answer appeases her!
She really had an agenda in her mind and admitted she wanted her hair done before my mother made it down again.
Her statement was "So your mom knows I'm being taken care of." I chuckle on the inside because really what she is saying is "I want to get out." You would have to know my grandmother to know how to translate her words. I know her very well!
I'll be the good granddaughter and make the call and get her scheduled for her haircut. Let's face it if you are a girl then you know that having your hair done just lifts your spirits! She deserves the dignity of looking and feeling good as much as she is able.
"Yes, Grandma. I know. I'll take care of you," is my somber reply.
I have been her "go to girl" for about six years now and increasingly so the past few years. She often comments to others "I don't know what I would do without her." That comments warms my heart and I just feel simple pleasure that I can payback all she has done for me the past forty (almost forty-one) years.
Small things like setting her answering machine, clocks, microwave, nightlight timers were things I would do for her. Now that she is in adult foster care home my repsonsibilities have slightly shifted. Those tasks are no longer mine; however, I do still assist with various doctor, hair, eye, ear appointments and all her paperwork and mail.
She tells me that she is due for a haircut and would like it this week. A little demanding? Sometimes she can be, but that just reminds me where I get that character trait. I remind her that it's only been a month and she wants to argue about that. So I simply tell her that I will call and see what her hairdresser has available. That answer appeases her!
She really had an agenda in her mind and admitted she wanted her hair done before my mother made it down again.
Her statement was "So your mom knows I'm being taken care of." I chuckle on the inside because really what she is saying is "I want to get out." You would have to know my grandmother to know how to translate her words. I know her very well!
I'll be the good granddaughter and make the call and get her scheduled for her haircut. Let's face it if you are a girl then you know that having your hair done just lifts your spirits! She deserves the dignity of looking and feeling good as much as she is able.
Thursday, January 5, 2012
Growing Old with Dignity
I muster up my inner courage as I drive to my grandmother's new place of residence. My heart is breaking on the inside because she can no longer live in her home of fifty-eight years. She requires more monitoring and assistance with simple daily activities. So the only logical solution was to relocate her to a place where she can be cared for at the level she requires.
Today she has an eye appointment. I am the one who gets to assist in taking her. This is a critical appointment for her and could result in bad news. Her eyes have deteriorated much with Macular Degeneration. The doctor could very well claim her to be "legally blind". She is well aware of her failing eyesight because the books she loves to read are no longer an option.
Part of my perks in being the local granddaughter was picking out large print books for my grandma at our local library. I would peruse the shelves in the Large Print section searching for Westerns and Mysteries, these were her favorites. I would quickly skim the synopsis on the back cover to determine if it would be a good one for grandma. She would let me know what books she enjoyed. She has never had a problem voicing her opinion. I guess I get that character trait from her! Her days of reading have come to a close. The large print is not legible for her poor eyes. One of her favorite pastimes is no longer available due to her deteriorating eyes. I am heartbroken for her once again!
We sit there together at the doctor's office and she asks me, "What is going to happen to my eyes?" This is now my moment of truth. Do I give her the honest answer or do I sugar coat it? Of course I respect my grandmother and the dignity she deserves. I let her know the end result of her disease will be blindness. She is aware of this, she had a friend who had this disease and she has been told in the past what will happen. She confides in me, "I hope I go before then." In all honesty I hope that for her as well. Watching a loved one slowly decay in front of you is not an easy thing. I am very proud of my grandma for all those years she lived independently. I am going to give her the dignity she deserves!
On our way back I surprise her with a coke from McDonald's; that made her day so much brighter! It's the small things now that make a difference. I am going to keep up with the small things!
Today she has an eye appointment. I am the one who gets to assist in taking her. This is a critical appointment for her and could result in bad news. Her eyes have deteriorated much with Macular Degeneration. The doctor could very well claim her to be "legally blind". She is well aware of her failing eyesight because the books she loves to read are no longer an option.
Part of my perks in being the local granddaughter was picking out large print books for my grandma at our local library. I would peruse the shelves in the Large Print section searching for Westerns and Mysteries, these were her favorites. I would quickly skim the synopsis on the back cover to determine if it would be a good one for grandma. She would let me know what books she enjoyed. She has never had a problem voicing her opinion. I guess I get that character trait from her! Her days of reading have come to a close. The large print is not legible for her poor eyes. One of her favorite pastimes is no longer available due to her deteriorating eyes. I am heartbroken for her once again!
We sit there together at the doctor's office and she asks me, "What is going to happen to my eyes?" This is now my moment of truth. Do I give her the honest answer or do I sugar coat it? Of course I respect my grandmother and the dignity she deserves. I let her know the end result of her disease will be blindness. She is aware of this, she had a friend who had this disease and she has been told in the past what will happen. She confides in me, "I hope I go before then." In all honesty I hope that for her as well. Watching a loved one slowly decay in front of you is not an easy thing. I am very proud of my grandma for all those years she lived independently. I am going to give her the dignity she deserves!
On our way back I surprise her with a coke from McDonald's; that made her day so much brighter! It's the small things now that make a difference. I am going to keep up with the small things!
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